U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
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