So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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