So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
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you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
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