You work out of a Hotel?
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Randomize
