i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
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Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
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Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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