Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
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