what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Randomize