I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
In the future we'll all be gay
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
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