WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Randomize
