People in love make me want to vomit
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Randomize
