Kiss
Puke
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
