I think scott just propositioned me for sex
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize