Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
