shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
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His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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