I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
