1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Two words: nipple clamps
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