I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
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i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
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Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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