What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
