it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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