What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
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