Texts From Last Night

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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?

  (443): View more from Maryland

  We using my standards or yours?

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  (301): Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad? (443): We using my standards or yours? http://tfl.nu/agac
  Replies (7) Good night (3164) Bad night (771)
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  (707): View more from California

  i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.

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  (707): i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either. http://tfl.nu/icf7
  Replies (55) Good night (4559) Bad night (604)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore

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  (410): I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore http://tfl.nu/l2tw
  Replies (33) Good night (962) Bad night (2360)
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  (805): View more from California

  Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are

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  (805): Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are http://tfl.nu/ste8
  Replies (16) Good night (6690) Bad night (850)
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  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.

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  (580): Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged. http://tfl.nu/xha8
  Replies (57) Good night (2430) Bad night (4611)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"

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  (917): I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people" http://tfl.nu/5d9d
  Replies (20) Good night (7789) Bad night (1994)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often

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  (413): your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often http://tfl.nu/h345
  Replies (5) Good night (3306) Bad night (1000)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.

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  (250): I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete. http://tfl.nu/p0ju
  Replies (15) Good night (5930) Bad night (922)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me

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  (715): Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me http://tfl.nu/9534
  Replies (2) Good night (1065) Bad night (2484)
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  (530): View more from California

  sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom

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  (530): sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom http://tfl.nu/p21d
  Replies (29) Good night (2336) Bad night (679)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"

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  (+44): he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest" http://tfl.nu/pc1a
  Replies (5) Good night (598) Bad night (1757)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I've fallen from my one moral pedestal

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  (865): I've fallen from my one moral pedestal http://tfl.nu/rkax
  Replies (3) Good night (650) Bad night (903)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.

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  (937): so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency. http://tfl.nu/1ixd
  Replies (3) Good night (2061) Bad night (595)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?

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  (714): Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top? http://tfl.nu/jf8l
  Replies (2) Good night (633) Bad night (419)
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  (714): View more from California

  I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics

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  (714): I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics http://tfl.nu/rtl0
  Replies (3) Good night (366) Bad night (143)

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