Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
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hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
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I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots