It's like God shit irony all over that family
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.