forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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