remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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