Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize