Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
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