hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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