I was born with a shot glass in my hand
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize