I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
