sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
