dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
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raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
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No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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