Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Randomize
