3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
It was confusing and full of hummus
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize
