we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
