Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
