He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I did not marry a roomba.
Randomize
