there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Randomize
