Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
