JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
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