New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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