I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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