please come you make the beer taste better
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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