ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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