im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
