This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize