I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
