so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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