it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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