Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.