just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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