when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
