drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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